One Quiet Voyage

Yet again

You have taken my breath away.  You seem to keep doing it.  You seem to enjoy the torment you put me through. 

Confessions

I know you do it. I do it too. I search for old romances on the internet. I am still curious about how they are doing.  I did it today.  I came across someone who still has command of places in my heart.  I do not know why I still (after over 10 years) have not been able to fully move on to other things. 

In this I am starting to realise something rather interesting.  We both seem to have taken completely different paths to the same place!  In fact, I found out that we were about to meet again in March if I had gone through with the plans I had. 

In irony of ironies, more than one person in my life recently noted the same phenomenon.  It almost seems as if some people are linked over time and space.  As if providence itself pulls people together.

Mixed Emotions

I am very happy you found someone you like.  I hope you are not settling for someone just because that is what is available.  But if you are happy, then I will be happy for you as well. 

Conflicts and dreams

I can feel the conflict in you.  I can see you searching out for others.  And yet, I know you cannot say what you really feel.  It is so frustrating to have left unsaid the truth.  And yet, we both know the truth.  At least, I think you know the truth somewhere within you. 

I am still torn.  I think you know this.  Societies rules are a burden.  I do not understand the reason for these rules.  I know that more people count on me and live off of my decisions.  As a result, I know I must take pains to do things properly. 

There always seems to be so much conflict and so few answers.  But leaving everything unsaid only prolongs the turmoil. 

Some things are not going my way right now.  I am facing an ever increasing challenge.  I need to focus on my goals.  I need to adapt again.  What worked well in the past is not working now.  I must get better.  I must become smarter and stronger. 

It was wonderful talking to you yesterday.  I love hearing your smile.  I also can feel the sting in your heart and the pains resonating somewhere deep within you.  I know you still hurt.   You are not ready for that which you seek.   And yet, you are still chasing in the hopes that somewhere you will find the antidote to the poison within you.  Sadly, you keep running from the one place where the antidote lives, within your own heart. 

I will keep speaking truth and light to you.  I care for you.  You must face yourself properly someday.  When you do, I will gladly hold your hand and cheer for you.  I will face down the darkness with you if you want.  But this must be faced.  But until then, I know you want to run. 

tumblrbot asked: WHAT IS YOUR EARLIEST HUMAN MEMORY?

I generally hate trying to recall memories.  I have some images from when I was 2 years old.  I was in the car asking my parents when I would turn 3 years old.